Journal

wow…and again, wooow..

Wow, can’t believe I’m getting older again. Time does fly in a speed of lights. Can somebody make it stop ticking now, eh? haha. You know, I always love birthday for the blessings and gifts and loves all around you. For the special feelings they gave. But on the other side of the sword, I loathe it. Not that I hate getting older, its just how I’m afraid of facing the possibility of losing my life every single second now. Yup, birthday shorten up my lifespan. I am, like a coward saga, afraid to die. My long journey in this matrix called life has yet to give me enuff or even proper kind-deed-deposit to face the great Almighty when I’m dead. Owh..*sigh* Even to imagine what hell is like, wow…just scary wow.

On top of that, up till today I still hate it when people call me “momma”, “mrs.”, “mam..” and such. Yea yea I know, I’m in a huge denial .  Thing is, I feel 20-something isn’t worth calling mom, you should just keep it until I at least reach the 30s since you’d be calling me that for the rest of my life anyway. Why not save it for later? Woman is quite sensitive about their age because when we grew, we look less pretty than you guys will be when you reach the same age. A~nd pretty much other reasons, hoho. nuff said, I hate being called mom. Birthday pinned the said issue in my head, with a devilish smile 

And by the way, I feel like I ain’t climbing that much moreover reaching those stars I’ve been wishing about. I am nothing in my first quarter life. That is sad. So much i wanna do, either less time or motivation to do it. Gotta work harder I guess. But despite every gloomy birthday beetalk I had today, I am all blissful to look back and realize I had so many friends who care & give me strength whenever I’m down, keeping me to my humble state up ’til today. Thank you all my dearest. My love will remain strong to all of you ♥ ♥ ♥

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